"And now a buffoon's meeting with the dean of admissions at aprestigious college ."Dean: "Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulationson your upcoming graduation and I understand you are interested inmatriculating here in the fall."Buffoon: "I got a snake, man!"Dean: "Yes, pets are welcome here on cam pus. Be it the traditional dog,or cat, or even the occasional reptile."Buffoon: "One time I fed it some beer man! It was slithering this wayand that! It was all fucked up!"Dean: "I'm sure it was. Well we discourage inappropriate drinking am ongboth students and pets here on campus."Buffoon: "Fuckin' Shit!"Dean: "Yes, th at's a not uncommon reaction to this policy. So tell me alittle bit more about y our background."Buffoon: "My father's a fucking asshole, man!"Dean: "Hmm, I see. Your feelings of rebelion are not unusual at your ageson."Buffoon: "My mother's a piece of shit too!"Dean: "Well, I hope you can find an outlet for your hostil ity over thesummer so you can come to school in the fall relaxed and ready tolea rn."Buffoon: "My teacher in high school was a stupid bitch, man! She had herhead way up her ass!"Dean: "Well the quality of the faculty at a University such as ours farexceeds that of a local public high school."Buffoon: "Your secretary's a real fat bitch, man!"Dean: "Yes, she's tried many diets over the years with min imal success."Buffoon: "I had diarhea last month. I had to shit all fucking day! "Dean: "Uh huh, Well we all get the occasional stomach bug, never apleasurable e xperience. So have you given any thought to your choice ofmajor?"Buffoon: "I've got a big fucking boner right now."Dean: "I see. Well sexual arrousal is not unc ommon during periods ofnervous tension. I do not take offense."Buffoon: "One tim e I ate my neighbors shit!"Dean: "That's understandable. Well, I enjoyed meeting you. We'll besending you our decision by the end of the month."Buffoon: "I bet you got really hairy balls."Dean: "Yes, it's a veritable forest down there. Bye bye."
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