Well, billy went down to the battleground To find a little trinket he could call his own Didnt see nothin lying around He decided hed dig awhile Well he dug her up and he dug her down fore too long he found some bones Poor little billy couldnt make a sound When the bones sat up and smiled
Oh billy you seem like a fine young man No reason to be a tremblin soul Come over here and shake my hand Make my proud acquaintance Well billy he was stunned he could hardly stand Whether he could move he didnt know But he knew he had to formulate some kinda plan Or try the bonemans patience
The first thing he wanted to do was breathe So he gulped in some of that battleground air Next thing he wanted to do was leave But billy wasnt raised up rude Well the boneman grunted and he gave a heave All of a sudden he was loomin there Shakin off dirt and actin pleased Things didnt look too good
Well billy decided what the hell You dont meet a boneman every day A little bit skinny but you never can tell He might be a pretty good guy Well they started off with the old soft sell fore too long they were jawin away By the time the darkness fell They were seein socket to eye
They decided right then on a life of crime With the bonemans looks and billys brains They could scare old scrooge out of his last dime Might as well have a go Billy he would picked the place and time From the corner store to the railroad train Boneyd flash him a smile sublime And billy hed grab the dough
They decided they might as well start right then Times awastin so they say They headed for the park Where the lights are dim And only the foolish tread He was whistlin a tune When they spotted him strollin along So plump and gay Boney gave him a great big grin And billy snagged his bread
Next come a lady of the night Boney saddled up and said hello Gave the poor thing such a terrible fright She fainted dead away Billy lifted her purse and her earrings bright Diamond rings and watch you know Couldnt figure out try as they might Why theyd ever worked a single day
Billys plans ended up in ruin you know They were workin a quaint little neighborhood Spied an old lady about eighty or so Almost looked too easy Boney put on a pretty good show The little ol lady didnt see too good My kind sir your all bones you know You need something hot and greasy
Grabbed ol boney drug him inside Billy peeked in through the window sill She fed him boiled and baked and fried Ol boney hes chewin like crazy He gobbled up everything he tried Pounds added on like you know they will Billy laid down in the dirt and cried Watchin boney gettin fat and lazy
Well billys back workin his job by day Sleepn nights it aint so bad Never liked stealin anyway Kinda gives a guy the willies Boney and ma got a new cafe Best baked beans you ever had Mas expecting any day And they say theyre gonna name him billy
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